Chapter 9

            Never in her life—not even at the triple funeral following the crash—had Jocelyn felt so horribly conspicuous as she did when they rode into the Med-jai village.  She held onto Ardeth as tightly as a drowning man to a lifeline, keeping her eyes down except for quick, surreptitious glances at her surroundings.  Her first impression was one of eyes: eyes in every shade of brown from sepia to black, watching her, following her.  Med-jai warriors were everywhere, their black garments and tattoos giving a sense of mystery to the scene.

            A number of the Med-jai made extended eye contact with Ardeth, and Joss sensed that meaningful communication was contained in those looks.  Whatever her dark rider was conveying to his fellows, it was accepted and acknowledged by brief nods from the others before they returned to their business.  “Do not be afraid or anxious, my little one,” Ardeth murmured to her.  “No one here has a quarrel with you.  They cannot help being curious—most of the women and children have never seen a westerner.”  Jocelyn glanced up, reassured by his calm kindness.  His calm evaporated, to be replaced by a dark flame.  “Oh, Jocelyn . . . what delights lie in your beautiful eyes.  They are like the sea, the color ever-changing, with mysterious depths I am waiting—most impatiently—to explore.”  He felt her tremble in his arms and drew her closer, laughing quietly as he looked ahead to guide the horse.  “You tremble now with anticipation, my heart.  Soon you will tremble for quite another reason.”

            They rode a bit longer before Ardeth drew back on the reins, stopping the horse in front of one of the many tents that made up the settlement.  Jocelyn was shaking, as much from nerves as from desire.  She felt unworthy of this man, afraid that she would disappoint him as a lover.  Stephen had never given any sign of being unhappy with her in bed, but she suspected that Ardeth’s experience and expectations far exceeded those of her nice, unimaginative husband.  The insecurities she had about her body were gnawing at her; as desperately as she wanted to be with Ardeth, she dreaded having him undress her and see her aging breasts, her stretch marks and veins.  She fought off panic and tried not to burst into tears.  “It should have stayed a dream,” she thought.  “If only it had!”

            Then she felt Ardeth swing himself down from the horse.  He reached up to her, his eyes hotter than the surrounding sands, a sensual smile on his face.  “Come, Jocelyn.  We are here . . . there is no more need to wait, my little one!”  Swallowing hard, Joss leaned forward into the secure hold of his strong hands.  As she slid down from the saddle, Ardeth held her close to him so that the length of her body moved across his.  His body was so hard under his robes!  Her need began to burn away her self-consciousness  and anxiety. Even if he never wanted her again, he wanted her now.  She would have the gift of being his lover this once and could have that memory forever.

            A boy of about ten appeared at Ardeth’s side and he spoke to him briefly.  The child nodded and led the horse away to be cared for after its hard trip.  Joss noticed several women watching her, talking quietly and laughing behind their hands.  Her cheeks burned and she turned away quickly.  She felt so exposed!

            “What is wrong, Jocelyn?”  Ardeth’s face was puzzled.

            “Those women,” she whispered.  “They’re talking about me, about us, I’m sure of it.  They . . . .” she stopped, trying to steady her voice.  “They . . . know, what we’re . . . .”  Her voice died away.

            Ardeth glanced at the women and then bent down to speak into Joss’s ear: “Of course, they know, my sweet.  The whole village knows that I rode out today, determined to fight the very demons of hell, if necessary, to find the woman from my dream, the woman who has possessed my heart and mind.  And they all hoped I would find her, if only to have their chief able to focus once more on being their chief.”  He gave a low chuckle.  “They are not mocking you, Jocelyn, or laughing unkindly.  Indeed, they would find it most confusing if I brought you back here and did not take you straight to my bed.  One of those women is my aunt, and she has despaired of ever seeing me settled again.  She is greatly pleased, I promise you!”

            Jocelyn gave an embarrassed squeak at the news that one of the women watching them so knowingly was Ardeth’s aunt.  “Oh, please, Ardeth, let’s go in, now!  Please?  I can’t bear being watched any more!”

            “Of course, my heart.  May every request made of me be one I am so delighted to fulfill!”  With that, he drew back the flap of the tent and ushered her inside.

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A Dream Realized – Chapter 10