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    Tales From Sha-Hair-Azad:

    These Walls Can Talk

    By Najya Yasirah


    Chapter 5: What Up Ma?


    Reyjah took off her boots when she entered. Her feet were killing her. “Good gracious, I hope I don’t develop hammer toes,” she said. She hit the ‘play’ button on her answering machine. “Reyjah, this is Arianna, are you working out tomorrow?..Rey Rey this is Derrick, make sure your hair is clean before I even touch it tomorrow…Reyjah, this is Akilah, girl when are you gonna sing for us again?..Reyjah,baby girl, this is mom, call me on my cell..?..This is Rockhard magazine, we received your slides, we will be getting back you very soon….End of messages.” She hit the “stop” button and hit the “speedial” and “speaker on” buttons. “Hello?” “Hey mom!” “Hey baby, how are you?” “Mom, life is weird.” Reyjah took off her jumpsuit and threw it on the carpeted floor. “Do you remember that next door neighbor I told you about?” Reyjah plopped down on her couch. “Ow!” she groaned. “What’s wrong?” “My neighbor dropped me on my ass this morning.” “You had sex with him?” “Hell no, ma! I mean, I went over to his apartment and asked him and his woman to keep quiet, and he threw me out on my ass!” “Did you press charges?” “For what! Okay, Hi, I wanna press charges against my neighbor because he has loud sex in his own home?” “I see your point.” “He could have gotten me for trespassing; I stormed through his door and went in his bedroom.” “Was the girl in it?” “Yep?” “You went and talked to the girl?” “Yeah, I asked her to bite the pillow next time.” Her mom laughed. “And guess what, ma?” “What?” “He came in today to get a haircut, and he’s taking me out to dinner tomorrow night.” “At a chicken shack?” Reyjah laughed. “No ma, at a really bourgeois restaurant where people wear to-tight dresses with no underwear and bunion-inflicting shoes.” Reyjah’s mom laughed at her daughter’s way with words. “I know you have nothing to wear.” “He said he’d handle it.” “Uh-oh” “Uh-oh what, ma? I don’t like him like that, he’s a damn manwhore for Pete’s sake.” “A what? He calls it a ‘gigolo’ I call it a paid dick.” “I call it nuts, no pun intended.” “Yeah, and he had the balls to tell me.” “If his balls aren’t decayed by now.” “Eew, ma!” Reyjah laughed. She went to the fridge and poured herself a glass of V8 Splash, Fruit Medley flavor. “So how’s ‘Dreamgirls’, ma?” “Tiring, this has been my first break in three weeks.”  “Reminds me of my gymnastic days,” said Reyjah. She took a sip of her juice. “Are you still wearing those blue contacts?” “Yes.” “Did you relax your hair?” “Yes.” “Are you still a virgin?” “Yes, mom, I am still a virgin.” “Are you dating?”  “Hell no!” “You are straight, right?” “Very.” “Okay, you sound fine to me.” “How’s dad?” “He’s okay I guess, there’s been a lot of shootings, and he’s been on call a lot. He’s proud of you, babe, and of course, so am I.” Reyjah pushed her hair behind her ears and smiled. She had diamonds in both her cartilages. “I love you, mom.” “I love you, too.” Reyjah hit the “speaker off” button.  She went back to her spot on the couch and searched under the cushions for the remote. “Ha! Ha! found you!” she said in triumph. She clicked directly to the Cartoon Network. “Yeah…Powerpuff Girls!!” she said. Reyjah was basically a grown-up child. She collected kaleidoscopes and had a Playstation. She collected Japanese anime along with her kungfu and boxing flicks. Cartoons served as an escape from reality. She never watched the news, and she didn’t give a damn about the President.  Mind you, she was like a child, but not at all immature. When she had finally gotten comfortable, her doorbell buzzed. “You die!” she said to whomever. Dressed in her blue Vickie Secrets, she answered the door.


    Tales From Sha-Hair-Azad: These Walls Can Talk - Chapter 6